November 2011
1 post
4 tags
fauxppointment
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
fauxppointment (n.) - an appointment for which the designated time does not actually matter.
A relatively recent coinage, fauxppointment dates back to a Wednesday in mid-September 2010. On that day a much older and wiser Sandy Dunlap placed a call to a local mechanic. The mechanic answered, and a time was arranged for Sandy to bring in his vehicle...
August 2011
1 post
1 tag
cattriloquist
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
cattriloquist (n.) - one who talks with a feline, supplying both sides of the conversation. Cattriloquism does not have to be on public display; oftentimes it occurs in private.
It is unknown when exactly cattriloquism began, but experts in the field strongly believe that ancient Egyptians were the first cattriloquists.
The first recorded case of...
June 2011
1 post
2 tags
emaciapate
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
emaciapate (v.) - to liberate through starvation (most always self-imposed).
The origins of this word date back to the spring of 1998 when the political dissident and prisoner Moomira, in his second month of a hunger strike that had reduced his weight from a healthy 170 pounds to an unsettling 70 pounds, was brought before the grand tribunal of his...
May 2011
2 posts
1 tag
self-genuflective essay
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
A self-genuflective essay is an essay in which the writer is obviously and oftentimes blatantly self-absorbed, narcissistic, solipsistic. It is not always religious in nature. The term is purported to have been coined by one Peabody Winkler, no relation to Henry, who on the morning of Thursday, January 9, 1997 was accosted by one of his previous...
1 tag
easedropping
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
easedropping is an action noun commonly classified as “childhood mangling of adult English”. The origins of this word date back to the spring of 1991, when four-year-old Ivan Workwax was placed on the toilet and told that if he could go potty like a grownup, he would get the unopened Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle action figure that had been...
April 2011
3 posts
Depo Marte
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encylopedia
Depo Marte was a small town in either Vermont or the Canadian province of Quebec; the dispute as to which country—the United States or Canada—can officially lay claim to having once harbored the town remains unresolved.
Depo Marte is mentioned more than once in the series titled The Holt Letters: A Correspondence Between A Father and His...
1 tag
Fifty-Alarm Fire
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Fifty-Alarm Fire was a short-lived rock band active from early 1999 until late 2001. The band consisted of founding members Hall Blakely on lead vocals, bass guitarist Sal Whetherman, drummer McQueen Mercey, lead guitarist Tulare Centro, and master tintinnabulator Joz Richardsline. Indeed, the band’s early sound relied greatly on...
1 tag
underminded
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
underminded is a noun classified as “German mangling of American English”. The word’s meaning is not derived from ‘undermined,’ though the pronunciation is nearly identical.
‘Underminded’ was first encountered at the outdoor beer garden in the back of the restaurant-bar Jupiter in Berkeley, California on the...
March 2011
4 posts
1 tag
non-ditch
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
non-ditch is an adjective classified as “American mangling of British-English”.
The exact time-origination of the American-mangled version is unknown but likely dates back to November of 2005 when two EFL (English as a Foreign Language) teachers were on a tram headed back to their respective apartments in a tiny but pleasant suburb of...
1 tag
agbotiphil
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encylopedia
agbotiphil (adj.) - this word’s discovery is questionably attributed to Ms. Vivian Gillepsie, a fourth grade teacher in Bend, Oregon. On the night of April 25, 2006, Ms. Gillepsie was in the midst of grading when she was struck by the title of one of her student’s papers. The title read simply: “Agbotiphil Essay”. The author was...
1 tag
napple
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
napple is a noun classified as “American mangling of British-English”. The word from which it mutated is “netball,” a British version of basketball.
On a cracked and uneven basketball court in October of 2005 two EFL (English as a Foreign Language) teachers were shooting hoops. The American teacher mentioned Shaquille...
1 tag
Tyler Modeson
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
Tyler Modeson is the presumed name of a movie character in an as yet unidentified drama released at some point during the 1970s. The movie centers on a boy falling in with the wrong crowd. At the start the boy is basically a good kid, and he has a teacher, Mr. Modeson, a middle-aged man, we may assume unmarried, who tries his hardest to get his...
February 2011
4 posts
brozen
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
brozen (adjective) - even more boldly shameless or impudent than the average male human being. This extreme form of brazenness is attributed most particularly to the male species known as “bro”. Unlike most other words in Ewaldapedia, its exact time-point and personage of inception are unknown.
in use: “He was being a complete...
essume
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
essume is a verb meaning “to take for granted or without proof when using e-mail; suppose by means of e-mail; postulate using e-mail; posit when communicating via e-mail—invariably with unintended and unfortunate results.”
The earliest recorded use of the word dates back to September 2000, when a most vacant young man, Juniper...
victualigion
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
victualigion (noun) - the religion of food
in use: “I know this may be a personal question, but are you very victualigious?”
“I used to be, but now….I only venture into the kitchen once or twice a week at most, and I turn on the Food Network even less.”
18r
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
18r is a noun classified as “American mangling of universal text-messaging short-form”. The first recorded incidence occurred on the pleasant evening of Friday, September 30, 2005 when an American EFL teacher received a text message from his newly befriended British colleague.
He—the American EFL teacher—had minutes earlier...
January 2011
4 posts
Yazminella
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
Yazminella - the meaning of this noun did not become clear until the evening of Thursday, March 23, 2006, when a most agreeable couple, Beatrice Bahn and Steve Gilford, ventured into their local San Luis Obispo supermarket to pick up dinner.
After a brief debate the couple rolled to the back of the store and the seafood counter. Standing behind the...
"Self-Defeatist"
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
“Self-Defeatist” is a poem that was delivered as the end-note address at the Dennigworth Writers Conference on Friday, June 23, 2006. Although many versions have surfaced since that day, the poem that follows is considered by and large the definitive text. It would prove to be the final poem in the short but meteoric career of Katherine...
hollowlujah
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
hollowlujah is a victualigious word of praise invoked when a particular sound has been achieved in food.
That most idealistic of couples, the SLO-based Beatrice Bahn and her beau Steve Gilford, had just removed their beer bread from the oven. Beatrice, her paws suitably mitted, upended the bread pan. Predictably the loaf of bread, expertly formed,...
pavanecide
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
pavanecide is a noun that means the act of “killing” or phasing out the pavane, a stately dance dating from the 16th century. In recent years pavanecide has become so widespread that it is now a crime in many European countries.
The idea of pavanecide has widely been credited to the former modestly popular hip-hop start EZ Free-Z, famous...
December 2010
3 posts
tuverculosis
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
tuverulosis, more commonly known as ‘TV’, is a noun classified as “childhood mangling of adult English”. It was first used by one Bo Langland on the mild-mannered Sunday afternoon of May 11, 1986 while Bo and his father Bruce were seated in the living room watching the tube. The show on at the time was a Western the identity of...
commonation
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
commonation is a noun meaning “commotion within the nation as a whole”. It has variously been misused to mean ‘commencement’ (the start of something), ‘commotion’ (a hubbub, Bub), and ‘common’ (is a definition for this word really necessary?).
The first correct use of ‘commonation’ is...
generalogy
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
generalogy (noun) - the study of all things general. This includes—but is in no way limited to—good and evil, black and white, heaven and hell, fingers and toes, brick walls and volleyball courts, coffee tables and ash trays, candy dispensers and soft-serve frozen yogurt, cigarettes and alcohol, flower pots and creeping vines, dictionaries...
November 2010
2 posts
injurance
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
injurance (noun) - insurance that is so costly it causes the insured to seriously injure themselves out of frustration, reprobation, desperation, or a combination thereof. Types of injurance include auto, life, pet, earthquake, house/apartment, afterlife/judgment, educational mismanagement, parental mismanagement, mismanagement by son or daughter,...
hornted
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
hornted is an adjective most commonly used to describe a place inhabited by (or seemingly inhabited by) the ghosts of horned animals. These animals include—but are in no way limited to—Soay ewes, bighorn rams, black bucks, billy goats gruff, aoudad, Ankole cattle, Brahma bulls, takin, Sumatran rhinoceros, chamois, gaur, hartebeests, gayal,...
July 2010
4 posts
Church Church Durch
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
Church Church Durch (proper noun) is a misnomer for the Confraternity of Christian Doctrine attributed to one Sandy Dunlap who, at the important Christ age of twelve, was enrolled in his town’s CCD program for the first and last time. The instructor that year was a young man of no more than twenty or twenty-one whose ethnicity was questionable...
crassculinity
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
crassculinity (noun) — an exaggerated and overtly crude sense of manliness; an exaggerated and oftentimes crude sense of male power, particularly over women.
The origins of this word date back to early 2007, when a group of friends gathered at the bowling alley in San Francisco’s Presidio for a night of good times. One of the guys in this...
darkist
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
darkist (noun) — a person who has an excessively morbid sense of humor, or is otherwise prone to loaded September 11th-style statements and such.
in use: “How can you hang around Dylan? He’s so weird all the time, always talking about cows’ stomachs and baby tongues. He seems like such a darkist to me.”
“Oh, I...
Gene Rol
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
A promiscuous yet promising child from birth, Gene Rol (1966 - 1999/2000) knew he was meant for something greater than his parents’ fortunes. And yet those fortunes, in the words of Bernie Taupin and Elton John, “almost had him roped and tied.” After leading a privileged adolescence cusping on the treasures of the Feria Madre, Gene...
June 2010
4 posts
The Hangful Painnail
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
The Hangful Painnail was one of only a few rejected ideas from the mind of beloved children’s author Roald Dahl (1916 - 1990), he of such fantastic fables as James and the Giant Peach, Matilda, The BFG, and Danny, the Champion of the World. The manuscript of “Painnail”, pieced together from scraps found in a back-alley-cat dumpster...
denoumentia
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
denoumentia (noun) — a rare disease that occurs when a person theater-hops, whether voluntarily or accidentally, and walks in on a movie at its climax, thereby suffering severe trauma from having witnessed a scene or secret revealed. Although the introduction of airport-style signs flashing times and movie titles on the outside of each...
terrarist
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
terrarist (noun) - one who uses Google Earth to plan and carry out terrorist attacks.
(Alternative definitions include ‘a person who commits terrorist acts in the name of preventing widespread environmental damage’ and ‘one who commits environmental atrocities’—but the Google Earth-related definition is by far the most...
animateur
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
animateur (noun) - one who animates others physically and emotionally; not to be confused with the French word ‘animateur,’ which means ‘one who draws animated cartoons and comic strips.’
Highly attractive, animateurs can most often be found at expensive hotels and resorts. Common areas of sighting include poolside, in the...
May 2010
10 posts
congrugation
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
congrugation (noun) - religiously-minded agreement, most often occurring at a place of worship such as a church or a football stadium. The word is often confused with ‘congregation’ (a gathering; e.g. ‘The thirsty animals congregated at the lake’) or, to a lesser extent, ‘corrugation’ (the act or state of being bent...
The Legend of the Katana Killing
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
The Legend of the Katana Killing is a suburban myth rumored to have occurred on the night of Saturday, October 7, 1989 in the Goleta, California neighborhood of El Encanto Heights. Three boys—Ron Pepperworth, Eugene Petry and Buddy Vroom—ages nine, ten and eleven respectively, showed up shortly after seven o’clock at the house of...
doorish
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
doorish is an adjective classified as “German mangling of American or British English”. Its origins date back to the shiny afternoon of Monday, October 16, 2006 when Arnim, a most affable Bavarian recently arrived in San Francisco, stood in his hotel room on the sixth floor of the Westin and waited for the porter to leave.
The porter,...
The 'O' Terror of '88
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
For much of the year 1988, several American university libraries were held hostage by what is now commonly known as The ‘O’ Terror of ‘88.
It began on Monday, January 25th, when a student employee at the on-campus library of Mortson University in Orange, California paused in mid-shelving to inspect the book she held: the...
"Talk to Fidel"
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
“Talk to Fidel” was an ad campaign briefly considered by Fidelity Investments in the wake of Charles Schwab’s successful “Talk to Chuck” ads (c. 2007). The idea behind the “Talk to Fidel” slogan was that Fidelity Investments also could be the client’s friendly neighbor, right down the street and ready...
pragma cum laude
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
pragma cum laude is a noun related to both summa cum laude and magna cum laude, but whereas those two terms mean “with the highest academic distinction” or “with highest honors and praise,” pragma cum laude is defined as “with enough common sense and real world smarts to know what you want to major in from the get-go and...
sluffy
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
sluffy is an adjective meaning “poorly done,” “half-assed,” “inept.” It has been classified as “American mangling of British-English,” though in this case the meanings of ‘sluffy’ and the word from which it mutated, ‘sloppy’, are essentially the same.
The American-mangled...
The Gentleman Sea
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
The Gentleman Sea is the presumed final resting place of Gene Rol, icon and idol of the golden age of American EFL teaching. The area lies just to the east of Wake and the Marshall Islands, in the larger body of water known as the Pacific Ocean.
The sea was given its name only after research and investigations into the history of piracy in the area...
tyramn
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
tyramn (noun) - quite literally, “a tram tyrant” or “tyrant of the tram,” usually the driver but occasionally the rider as well. The word’s origin’s lie many feet deep in Brno, second-city of the Czech Republic, famous in certain circles for its trams.
Legend and rumor (but more rumor than legend, one supposes)...
Kenishment
from Ewaldapedia, the other free encyclopedia
Kenishment is a noun used to describe the act of taking an open bottle of beer away from a patron when that patron is not looking, retreating with said beer into the back of the bar and then, as the miffed and mystified patron looks on, upturning the bottle of beer and pouring its remaining contents into a trash can behind the bar.
The origins of...